This one has been a long time coming, but it’s a belter. I hope you enjoy it. Please share it if you do.
Reminder: these are COMIC songs.
As always, as a subscriber to this letter, you get to see it before anyone else.
🎵 Credits
Music is by the genius Noah Fleetwood, recorded and mixed by Wayne McIntyre.
Video by Goat, featuring Zara du Rose as Big Brother and Leo Kearse as assorted government inspectors, recorded at Red Creative - thanks Andy, as always - and Murder Mile.
With the magnificent vocal artistry of Emma Topping and backing vocals from Lynda Hayes.
Come and see us perform this song live … with a healthy dose of government disapproval.
We are coming to Birmingham and Huddersfield next week.
📅 Shows coming up
At time of writing it’s as follows, but if you are reading this in the future the full updated list is here.
London, Crazy Coqs, Nov 5. Tickets here. (SOLD OUT - waiting list only)
Huddersfield, Keys, Nov 14. Tickets here.
Birmingham, Glee, Nov 15. Tickets here
London, Crazy Coqs, Dec 3. Tickets here. (SOLD OUT - waiting list only)
London, Backyard, Dec 15. End of the Year Show. Tickets here. Not many left.
London, Crazy Coqs, Jan 21. Tickets here (These sell out quickly)
Stafford, Gatehouse, Feb 26. Tickets here.
Leeds, HiFi Club, Feb 27. Tickets here.
London, Crazy Coqs, March 4. Tickets here (These sell out quickly)
Lincoln, The Engine Shed. March 5. Tickets here.
Oxford, Glee, March 6. Tickets here.
Leicester, Just the Tonic at Peter’s Pizzeria, March 12. Tickets here.
Lichfield, Garrick. March 13. Tickets here.
Southend, Palace Theatre, March 26. Tickets here.
Guildford, G Live, March 28. Tickets here.
Swindon, Swindon Arts Centre, April 18. Tickets here.
If you can’t make any of these, you can always …
My full calendar, which includes talks, short spots in comedy clubs and the like, is here here.
I have also started a WhatsApp Channel, if you’d like to watch, share and swap songs there.
Lyrics
You’re all alone in this world, and sometimes you don’t know what to do. Your family, your friends, your first principles: they’re no good. What you need, what we all need, is … governing.
Govern me harder
Tell me what to do
Give me your guidelines
A council tax review
Govern me harder
Regulate me
Give some welfare
Educate me
If I step out of line
Slap me a fine
Drive in my car,
Levy a charge.
Say something bad,
Stick me in the gulag
Passports, permits, customs, budgets,
Visas, climate, councils, summits.
Tax.
Govern me harder
Tell me what to think
Statutory guidance
Tell me what to drink
I want health and safety
And your subsidy
Official directives
I need bureaucracy
It’s time for a bit of …. legislation.
Aaaah.
I want you to regulate the hell out of me.
Oooh.
I want you to make me … fill out a form.
Yeah.
Your laws are so big.
Mmm
I want them deep inside me.
Mmm
You’re governing me, baby.
I am. I’m governing you baby.
I don’t want you respecting my property rights
Je T’Aime.
Punitive taxes
Just want to comply
Brainwash my children
Tell me when to die
Govern me harder
Then govern me some more
Govern me harder
Can’t live without your laws
Tariffs, levies, mandates, treaties,
Vetoes, duties, senates, ID.
Aaaagghh!
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